it's not that im trying to imply that in a very sad person and you should all pity me KABLABLABLA, but im just stating something I realised after months of muscle aches every bloody day and being tired all the time. my brain is turning into smush.

usually, no matter how tired i am, no matter how shitty i feel, my brain still functions relatively normally. today, i was a glob of disgusting blur-ness. simple little riddles now take me a day to figure out. the tiny little things that i usually catch onto really quick seem to be getting further and further away. my brain is becoming blunt.

it's really horrifying, how much sleep and rest deprivation can do to the mind.

i won't blabber on too much about PD, but i must say i've learnt so much more about my team. i learnt about who i can depend on when i start losing my confidence, and who i can trust in court when it comes to crunch time, and who i feel the most comfortable celebrating with, because i know we earned it together.

i think besides gaining experience, we as a team really became aware of each other. we know that tammy doesn't mind eating half a packet of chipsmore at 2am in the morning :P i think we also realised that it's sometimes a hugeeeeee challenge to accept people the way they are. people who aren't involved directly in the team cannot make us show respect for a person who hasn't gained it.

humans are like that.


*


kapas on saturday. im getting cold feet about. maybe it's because i was directly involved with the planning. im so scared of it being screwed up. or not living up to expectations. my god the amount of stress is killing me.

you knowe what, i'll suck it up and go enjoy myself. CH'YEAH.



argh chemistry homework. kbye (: